gebieterin: (Default)
[personal profile] gebieterin
Working on a story for the "abuse" square on my h/c bingo card.

Just typed it down in one go and not got to 'polish up' yet. Tips? ^^

All the little things

Every big thing is a sum of all the little things that make it.

Little things like a phone call getting you in the position of becoming a drummer for band which would reach some major level of fame.

Little things like getting to know your bandmates and working together, supporting each other with so much ease as only good friends are apt to.

Little things, like smiles and casual touches from a certain dark haired guitarist that lingered a bit longer than necessary, later kisses and more leading to some big thing like love.

Little things like leaving stuff at his place until, piece by piece, you moved in.

Little things, like waking up next to each other, eating breakfast together, snuggling on the couch in the evening, adding up to contentment.

However, there is not only happiness made by little things.
There is also people's temper, sometimes foul.
First, there are little things.
Harsh words, uttered over little things that added up to frustration.
Silly little things. You like to get up early. He doesn't. He does not really like to clean up. You like the apartment clean. And so on. Nothing that would not be normal in any relationship.

But still more little things, like yelling, like cold silence, even violence.
It started small enough, a slap in an argument that left you both speechless, you from shock, and him from shame. And even though the two of you talked about it, you explained how with your background of an abusive father would not condone any form of domestic violence and he apologized, found excuses due to stress - it happened again. And again.
And like little thing often tend to, grew bigger and more terrifying.

Friends will notice little things.
Things like a bruise here, a split lip there.
Defeated silence, maybe some tears when you thought you were alone after a fight.
At first, little lies were gratefully believed, no one wanting to think about what dark big thing could lurk behind them.

But when enough little things were noticed, they prompted other little actions.
Uruha keeping you behind, while Ruki and Reita had some talk with Aoi. Prodding you for information you would not like to volunteer.
Little warnings that were not heeded, leading to your friends forcibly moving you and Aoi apart, while the two of you just stood there watching, helpless, letting them carry out all your little things, piece by piece, until you were officially homeless, but weren't, rather a guest at Uruha's until you could find a new apartment on your own.

It took little things, gentle words, assurances, small gestures of comfort, to coax the tears from you. Some and silent at first, adding up to exhausting sobbing that let you finally grief the relationship you still had not wanted to give up completely.

And it was just a little thing for friends to know that and not leave you alone with him after that. There were too many little things you first had to harden your heart against. Little things like the knowledge that he very much meant it when he said he was sorry and still loved you.

It was not like you hated him now, still very much the contrary, but there still were so many little things, like your jumpiness whenever he would so much as raise his voice in an argument. And friends will notice little things.

You did not want the others to be cold to him, to shun him outside of work. You knew he did not really mean to let his temper get the better of him. You did not want these little things to threaten to destroy the one big thing that was most important in all your lifes.

It took little things, apologies, promises, small gestures of comfort and goodwill, until a cautious trust was reestablished.

You hope that these little shows of trust one day will add up again to the bond you all shared, link by link forging again a chain of friendship.
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gebieterin: (Default)

May 2015


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